Daily Meditations from John N N Ng'ang'a: June 28th 2010 - Weekly Devotional

Day 1
13 Jesus went up on a mountainside and called to him those he wanted, and they came to him. 14 He appointed twelve-designating them apostles-that they might be with him and that he might send them out to preach 15 and to have authority to drive out demons. Mark 3:13-15 NIV

I have learnt that I am rather 'structured', allowing little time for God to come through. I need to be more flexible-to hang loose for God to 'swing' me to whatever direction he chooses ,assured that he has my best in mind.

I am also at times too busy to develop my friendship with God to the level it should be. I need to invest in this friendship more than I have done in the past .setting time to be with God will be useful because that is why he saved me.

When he called his first disciples, it was for similar reasons as the above verse shows. Before any duty, the reason for the call is 'that they might be with him'. I tend to see the reason for my call as to be busy in the ministry. I will need to refocus on the reason I am a Christian.

Day 2

18 Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." Matt 28:18-20 NIV

Once my spiritual formation has gone well, Jesus is ready to send me to others. I have learnt that my meditation will both benefit me and those Jesus brings my way.

This is why I am sharing my meditations with my friends and counselees, believing it will help them know my struggles more and hence be encouraged in their struggles. They will see what I am learning as I meet with the Lord and I hope it will also benefit them.

I have learnt that once it is clear to me that I fully belong to Christ, then, I must accept that his concerns must become mine. He is concerned about the world, and I should also be concerned. I should not live like a satisfied island.

My shallowness, I have discovered, is symptomatic of the church around me and I should be concerned about how to help others enjoy the wonderful relationship Jesus wants to have with them.

I do hope that my sharing of my meditations will help deal with this issue. But I also need to teach on the importance of these disciplines to Christians.

Day 3
8 If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness...1 John 1:7-10 NIV

I have learnt that God is a forgiving God. Initially, I struggled because I felt if you are Christian then you cannot sin. But I have since learnt that for God to have provided for a way out, it must have been because He knew that it is possible for His child to fall into sin. As I meditate, He will point sins in my life and I can do one of two things: run away from him (if that were possible) or admit my sin and be reconciled to Him acknowledging what His Son's blood accomplished for me. I have learnt that the better option is to acknowledge my sin and repent for He is always willing to forgive. [i]

When I learn from above verse that God really wants to forgive me and not to punish me, it helps me to be a better person. I need to accept that He could not have died on the cross and not want to forgive me. So he brings convictions so that he helps me not so that I am not condemned.

It is a wonderful relief when I learn to give in to the Spirit's conviction as I meditate. The reason for meditation is so that I would get his help to be more like Jesus. The struggle, then, prevents me from achieving this objective. It is my prayer that as I improve in my meditation, I will also learn to keep short accounts with God by repenting as soon as the Holy Spirit brings the conviction at whatever time of the day.

Day 4

19 All my intimate friends detest me; those I love have turned against me. 20 I am nothing but skin and bones; I have escaped with only the skin of my teeth. Job 19:19-20 NIV

As I relate to myself, the big struggle is to accept who I am-a fallen creature who at times may not do the good I want to do.

This is a continuous struggle. The solution again lies in accepting who Christ is and why He came on earth. Secondly, the realization that Christ has accepted me as I am helps me cease my struggles and accept myself.

This helps me to have a better self image and hence relate better with myself. It will then not matter what others think about me. God and me will agree that I am important in his sight and that is all that matters.

Day 5
8 I am a stranger to my brothers, an alien to my own mother's sons; 9 for zeal for your house consumes me, and the insults of those who insult you fall on me. Ps 69:8-9 NIV

Relating better with myself helps me to relate better with others.

The desire to be seen in good light by others has at times put me into bondage but again my release from this struggle is the realization that it really does not matter what they think about me. What matters is what Christ, who sees me from the inside, thinks about me. Once I cease to try to impress others I start enjoying my relationship with them.

I cannot be easily hurt by what they do or say. Most relationships suffer when the parties are too sensitive to what others do or say. So, learning this will help me to relate better with others whether it is at work, at play , whether with friends or relatives.

This in turn will bring down my stress level and help me enjoy serving the Lord by serving his people.