John N N Ng’ang’a Meditation of April 21st 2025 …. Infidelity: what promotes s**ual immorality
Day 1
Nevertheless, I have a few things against you: T: there are some among you who hold to the teaching of Balaam, who taught Balak to entice the Israelites to sin so that they ate food sacrificed to idols and committed sexual immorality.
So, say no to sex unless God has called you to marriage. He will give you a marriage partner if He wants you to have sex. He will be in that marriage not for a few years but for your lifetime. So, it is very important to understand that a lot of immorality comes from thinking, "I can never marry, but I still want sex."
My friend, if you want sex, then you must want marriage. If you want marriage, then you want sex. The two are inseparable; otherwise, you will soon get into sexual immorality. So, you need to understand that if you do not want marriage, you also should not want sex. Others argue, "But you know I have a motherly instinct? I would like to have a child." So, you feel like you want sex not for pleasure but to get pregnant. My friend, to be a mother requires you to be a wife. If you do not want to be a wife, you do not want to be a mother. The two are inseparable. Technology is challenging this, but the Bible has not changed.
You need to understand that if it is God’s intention for you to be married, sex will come along. But you argue that marriages do not last? It is true many marriages are broken, but yours is not everybody’s marriage. You are a child of God. Pray that God will give you a brother who loves and fears the Lord. Pray that God will give you a sister who loves the Lord so that the two of you will live together according to God’s dictates.
So, say no to sex unless God has called you to marriage. He will give you marriage partner if he wants you to have sex. He will be in that marriage not a few years but for your lifetime. So, it is very important to understand that a lot of immorality is coming out of thinking that I can never marry but I still want sex.
My friend if you want sex, then you must want marriage. If you want marriage, then you want sex. The two are inseparable otherwise you soon get into sexual immorality. So, you need to understand that if I do not want marriage, I also should not want sex. Others argue … but you know I have mother instinct? I would like to have a child. So, you feel like I want sex not for pleasure but so that I get pregnant. My friend to be a mother needs you to be a wife. If you do not want to be a wife, you do not want to be a mother. The two are inseparable. Technology is challenging this, but the bible has not changed.
You need to understand that if it is God’s intention that you will be married, sex will come along. But marriages do not last you argue? It is true many marriages are broken but yours is not everybody’s marriage. You are child of God. Pray that God will give you a brother who loves and fears the Lord. Pray that God will give a sister who loves the Lord. So that the two of you will be live together according to God’s dictates.
Day 2
The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity, and debauchery.
Research was done which showed that 60% of the adults who turned out to be virgins came from good homes. So, coming from broken homes predisposes you towards sexual immorality because you doubt marriage.
However, you need to understand that the Bible tells us when you become a Christian, according to 2 Corinthians 5:17, you have become a new creation. The old has passed away. It just means that you should not tie yourself to what is usual. You argue, "Oh, but you know my mother’s sisters are all single mothers." It is true, but you are not everybody. You are uniquely a child of God, and it is important to understand that.
But the real problem is that the biblical worldview is not our worldview. We are in church, but our worldview is not a biblical worldview. And we are starting to see things the same way as the world. We have what I am calling Christ-less Christianity.
I was in America in the 1990s, and somebody offered me coffee. But which coffee? They asked, "Do you want the decaffeinated one?" I asked, "What is decaffeinated?" I had never heard of decaffeinated coffee. They replied, "It is coffee without caffeine." I said, "Wait a minute! If you want coffee, how come you remove caffeine? Because coffee is caffeine."
There are people like that; they are in the Christian church but do not like Christ. I call them de-Christianised Christians. They have removed Christ from control of their lives, and they still want to be Christians. Like decaffeinated coffee, which is coffee without caffeine, they do not want Christ in them.
You need to understand that if that is your view, you will end up in sex because Christ is not in control of your life. And remember, you do not live righteously on your own power. It is Christ in you, the hope of glory. It is the presence of Christ in your life that gives you the ability to say no to sin. So, if He is not in control, there are going to be troubles.
Research was done which showed that 60% of the adults who turned out to be virgins came from good homes. So, coming from broken homes predisposes you towards sexual immorality because you doubt about the marriage.
However, you need to understand that the bible tell us when you become a Christian according to the 1 Corinthians 5:17, we have become a new creation. The old has passed away. It just means that do not tie yourself to what is usual. You argue: Oh, but you know my mother’s sisters are all single mothers. It is true but you are not everybody. You are uniquely a child of God, and it is important to understand that.
But the real problem is that the bible world view is not our world view. We are in church, but our world view is not a biblical world view. And we are starting to see things the same way as the world. We have what am calling Christ-less Christianity.
I was in America in 1990s and somebody offered me coffee. But Which coffee? Said do you want the caffeinated one? I asked what is caffeinated? I never heard of caffeinated coffee. He replied…it is coffee without caffeine. I said, wait a minute! If you want coffee, how come you remove caffeine? Because coffee is caffeine.
There are people like that, they are in Christian church, but they do not like Christ. I call them de-Christianised Christians. They have removed Christ in control of their lives, and they still want to be Christians. Like the caffeinated coffee that is, coffee without caffeine. …they do not want Christ in them.
You need to understand that if that is your view, you will end up in sex because Christ is not in control of your life. And remember you do not live righteously on your own power. It is Christ in you, the hope of glory. It is the presence of Christ in your life that give you the ability to say no to sin. So, if he is not control there is going to be troubles.
Day 3
I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people—
The other thing that is causing sin is something they are calling safe sex. They argue, "You know, we are not having dangerous sex; we are having safe sex." Safe sex does not exist! Sex outside marriage can never be safe. Why? If it is going to put you in hell, which is a greater danger than HIV.
You know some people are worried about HIV. They feel like, as long as they cannot get HIV, they are okay with casual sex. If you get HIV, it is likely you will die earlier than some of your friends. But the truth is we are all going to die. Am I right?
So, the real reason we live a righteous life is because this life is short, yet heaven is forever! Am I right? So, you need to ask yourself, is it worth it to have sex for three minutes and go to hell forever? I do not know how long sex takes, but you might have sex for three minutes and go to hell for eternity. Does it make sense? So that is what you need to ask yourself before casual sex.
So, safe sex is a misnomer. Because any sex that is outside God’s dictates is dangerous. And God’s dictate is to have sex for pleasure or procreation only with the person you have committed to for life, nobody else.
So, if that is the only route, any other will put you in hell.
I will try to repeat this: condoms reduce the chances of getting HIV and reduce the chances of getting pregnant. The word is they do not eliminate; they only reduce. How would you cheat yourself that wearing condoms helps when it does not eliminate the chance of HIV or pregnancy fully? You need to understand that the idea of safe sex has made many Christians end up in sex because they feel protected.
The other thing that is causing sin, is the something they are calling safe sex. They argue: You know we are not having dangerous sex; we are having safe sex. Safe sex does not exist! Sex outside marriage can never be safe. Why? If it is going to put you in hell, which is a great danger than HIV.
You know some people are worried about HIV. They feel like, as long as I cannot get HIV, am okay with casual sex. If you get HIV, it is likely you will die earlier than some of your friends. But the truth is we are all going to die. Am I right?
So, the real reason we live righteous life, is because this life is short, yet heaven is forever! Am I right? So, you need to ask yourself, is it worth it that I have sex for three minutes, and that way go to hell forever? I do not know how long sex takes but you might have sex for three minutes and go to hell for eternity. Does it make sense? So that is what you need to ask yourself before casual sex.
So safe sex is a misnomer. Because any sex that is outside God’s dictates, is dangerous. And God’s dictate is having sex for pleasure or procreation only with person you have committed to for life, nobody else.
So, if that is the only route, any other will put you to hell.
I will try to repeat this; condom reduces the chances of getting HIV and reduces the chances of getting pregnant. The word is they do not eliminate; they only reduce. How would you cheat yourself that wearing condoms helps when it does not eliminate the chance of HIV or pregnancy fully. You need to understand that idea of safe sex has made many Christians end up in sex. because they feel protected.
Day 4
Let us behave decently, as in the daytime, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy.
But the real problem is this person is not thinking about God but only thinking about HIV and pregnancy.
The moment you are Christian, who walks in the fear of God, the issue of pregnancy is secondary. After all pregnancy is not a sin.
I have just gone through the scriptures many times from 1968 I have read my Bible consistently. I do not know how many times have gone through the Bible from cover to cover. I did my KCPE in 19671967, and it is only when I entered in high school that I started understanding the importance of daily Bible reading. SoSo, I have read the Bible consistently for almost 60 years, but I have never seen anywhere where the Bible condemns pregnancy.
SoSo, my sister, once you test and it is pregnancy, start by saying that, Hallelujah! God is good to me. I am going to get a baby! But then say, by the way I will also go to hell unless I repent. You need to understand that there is nothing wrong with pregnancy. What is wrong is what you did to get the pregnancy.
You know some churches condemning people that are pregnant as if they have done something worse not understanding in the same youth group there are girls who are using family gadgets. They do not get pregnant.
You know you can cheat your church, but the Lord knows the reason you do not get pregnant is because you are using family planning gadgets. And those gadgets do not cheat God. No.
So, a girl who is sexually active and the one who got pregnant are equally guilty before the Lord. Pregnancy is not a sin. You should never try to kill a baby, or abort.
But you see this lack of teaching about the Bible view on sex can be a problem. You abort arguing you know it is going to bring shame in the name of the Lord. SoSo, I want you to help me to get an abortion. That way protect God’s name! Which name are you protecting?
Can you imagine an immoral woman wanting to protect God’s name, not by keeping holy but by actually becoming a murderer! In other words, she was simply going to hell for immorality, now she is going to hell for murder also. Surely why do you want to graduate into murder?
Day 5
Instead, we should write to them, telling them to abstain from food polluted by idols, from sexual immorality, from the meat of strangled animals and from blood.
So, you need to understand that this lack of understanding is the reason we are ending up immoral and please understand that the moment pleasure drives you, you will end up in sin. I am repeating myself; you desire pleasure with a boy, then sometimes you sit with a boy then you feel like what about if I tried? It is even better with a boy than with a girl! But it all started because you are driven by pleasure.
Now start desiring pleasure with a boy my sister and see the trouble because you are driven by pleasure, you say, these lesbians, they are also humans. In fact, some of them are our lecturers. There is nothing wrong with them. I want to also try. SoSo, you look for another girl and suggest, can we try? Where did it all begin? Being driven by pleasure.
So do not start thinking that the people who are involved LGBTQ are any worse than the ones that are heterosexual immorality. All immorality is equally wrong. It all begins by being driven by pleasure rather than by God.
Let me say I am still answering the question; why is there so much sexual immorality including LGBTQ today. Another reason is arguing, everybody is doing it.
In fact, the other day in a seminar somebody was giving a talk on the importance of condoms and said, let us all not pretend! Let us not pretend! All Girls at the university level are sexually active. Do not sit here cheating us. One Christian girl in the seminar wanted to say, no..…no, you cannot put all of us together. “Eeeeih look at the pretender.” Now everybody laughed at her.
Day 6
For it is from within, out of a person’s heart, that evil thoughts come—sexual immorality, theft, murder,
It has come to the level that if you as a youth are sexually active you are normal. If you are not sexually active, you are abnormal. But that is not the wrong way, you are actually super normal.
Now you need to understand that people who are sexually active before the wedding are fools. Because they are risking HIV, they are risking pregnancy but that is not the only thing, they are risking hell. Is it clever to risk hell? No, but they are making the girls who are virgins to look abnormal. SoSo, you need to understand that idea of “everybody is doing it” is part of the reason there is so much immorality. Do not believe everybody is immoral.
Originally when we heard about homosexuality and said, how can somebody do that? But the other day the president of America appointed homosexuals into the cabinet. Did you read it? So now in America homosexuals are cabinet ministers. Slowly mainstreaming it and so making it look normal. Something wrong… even if everybody does it …. will be still wrong.
So do not allow the idea that even the executive committee of the CU does it, even the people in the ministry do it move you. You are not everybody. If the Bible says it is wrong, it will be wrong even if the whole CU in this university does it. it will still be wrong even if the Pope does it.
You know they say, democracy is a very interesting thing. Democracy is test for popularity. When you are elected as president, you are not elected because you are good man or the best man. You are elected because you are the most popular. In democracy they do not choose competence but popularity
That is why in courts of law, they do not go by numbers. Were these elections won or lost? Instead of looking at the facts, you look at the IEBC, four against three! Now truth does not go with the issue of majority, it goes with evidence. Similarly, you need to understand what is right and what is wrong is based on evidence.
So similarly, you need to understand what is right and wrong is not based on everybody is doing it. No.
The majority can say, you have won, but the facts they say you have failed. A good court will say you have failed. And you need to understand that. Do not start doing things because others are doing it. Do what the scriptures say is right.
So do not go to your Pastor and because the Pastor does it, you think it is ok. There are popular good things and popular bad things.
Day 7
For out of the heart come evil thoughts—murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander.
Let me give you an example of this bad culture. For example, you have a new culture where as a speaker instead of talking to you, I tend to talk to your neighbour. Have you seen that? Does it happen in your CU? “talk to your neighbour.” I mean it looks so foolish, you cannot expect the whole university to be telling you. Because if I tell you, talk to your neighbour, it implies your neighbour is deaf and so cannot hear my voice.
Now surely unless there is something wrong with me as a speaker, how did I identify your neighbour is deaf? But If your neighbour heard me, why am I involving you to talk to him? But you know someone did it on TV, then others started doing it and all of us ended up doing it. It is foolish even if everybody does it. If I want to talk to you, I talk to you. I do not tell you to tell your neighbour! Telling yourself brings greater conviction because if you tell your neighbour, you are not listening yourself. You think the sermon is for your neighbour. I talk to you. That is why I am addressing you. That is why I am addressing every listener or reader directly.
I am talking of a culture where people do something foolish, still everybody is doing something foolish, and they assume it is okay for me to join them.
It is the same thing with sexual immorality. We start doing things and within no time we all think it is okay to do it. First of all, I want you to know it is not true that everybody is doing it.
Many girls may be sexually active but there are still girls in this campus who intend to go to the altar and the best gift they will give their husband is virginity.
There are boys in your campus who are “virgins.” Until I know a better word, boys are “virgins,” and they intend to donate a gift to their girlfriends on the day of the wedding called “virginity.”
So do not believe the devil when he says that everybody is doing it. Not true. Everybody is doing it and that you are the only one who is not doing it, it is not true. That way they make you feel lost. Do you mean you are 20 and you have never had sex? Are you actually normal? That is the way they make you think you not normal. My friend there is nothing abnormal about not having sex and you marry later at the age of 35 and you still enjoy sex. All biology shows, you do not enjoy sex at 35 better if you did it as a teenager. So do not listen to foolish ideas.
In some groups, 40% of them maybe virgins. But you cannot know that because in the discussion everybody claims are doing it.
This peer pressure makes you say,’’ even me, I have done it because you do not want to look foolish. SoSo, everybody says I have also done it. Now how are your holidays? Wonderful! Did you get a chance? Now you have just come from holiday. Yes! I did it many times. Yet you are lying. But the truth is it sounds out of order to say you have not yet done it.
Remember we are answering the question, how come the society is becoming so sexually immoral? And one of the things is this peer pressure. Everybody is doing it.
My sister, my brother, you are child of God. You are unique, walk in righteousness to heaven, aware that if you delight the Lord, he will meet the desires of your heart.
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